OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
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