someone threw a dead crab at me
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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