Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
love makes seman taste better
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Randomize
