Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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