She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize
