if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
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