Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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