You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
