We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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