i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
