ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
