just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
