Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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