pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
