The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
