Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
