is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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