goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
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