well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
