Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
