Whatcha textin bout Willis?
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
