GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
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