Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
