Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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