She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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