: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
