Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
