Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
