But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
