He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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