i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
