Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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