I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Randomize
