Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
