Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Randomize
