I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
