Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
