Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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