I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
