Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize