I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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