I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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