I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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