69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
