ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
