I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Randomize
