Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
