Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
