quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
