He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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